Six Degrees of Separation

Hello All!

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This week’s post follows a common theme of “handshaking”— a common but often overlooked part of our daily lives. Read on about how we use handshakes to communicate, congratulate and connect. In fact, handshaking is so important to American society that President Kennedy once commissioned a study to determine the most effective ways to shake hands! Scroll down!

Please remember that as these weekly posts stack up you can go back and read them or refer others to the archives at montanacharley.com.

Thanks!

Charley

Coming up to the Boy Scout Point boat launch at Hell Creek on Ft. Peck Lake we spotted a skinny dark-haired little girl casting from the shore. We watched her fish while waiting for the dock to clear. She was maybe 30 yards away.

At first we thought the girl was alone. But, what appeared to be her little brother was down the bank throwing rocks. After a few casts the girl got a strike that nearly pulled her off the grassy bank and into the water. Barefooted, she grabbed a toehold, and started pulling and reeling.

With rod bent nearly double, the little girl started yelling, “Oh my God, oh my God, oh my God!”

Like a pro, she kept the rod tip up, line tight. The fish took a couple runs. Stepping back, she was finally able to gain on the fish and slide it up the bank and onto a patch of grass. She had just landed the biggest Northern Pike we’d ever seen.

The fish was literally more than half the size of the little girl.

It didn’t end there though… A pike’s nature is to viciously slap and and roll and fight in an effort to get back into the water. The girl was having none of it. Now aided by the little brother, she tried scooping and kicking the fish up the bank—staying clear of it’s snapping mouth.

In a valiant move, the girl dove on the fish, tackling it like a Florida alligator wrestler.

Skinny little arms wrapped around the fish, rolling in the grass she prevented the monster from flopping off the bank.

Meanwhile the boy found a stick and tried beating the pike into submission. Covered with mud and fish slim, the girl jumped up and grabbed the stick from her brother. Giving a mighty, well-aimed heave she speared the pike, pinning it to the ground. It wasn’t going anywhere.

Showing the glory of a Roman Gladiator the girl pumped a fist in triumph as the boy danced around the fish celebrating the moment.

The three men watching from the boat cheered the victory along with some onlookers on the dock.

Motoring up to the ramp, we turned back to see the girl and boy had run the stick through the pike’s mouth. Hand on each end of the stick they were dragging the fish back to camp.

Later we found Maria and her brother Caleb by their dad’s tent—she’s nine and he’s six—still grinning, still muddy from head to foot.

We wanted to shake their hands!

Not only did Maria fish like a pro, she shook hands like a pro. Maybe there’s a connection…

Dad was over the fire frying fillets in a cast iron skillet. The mighty pike had met its match.

Epilogue: Three grown men spent an entire day trying to catch a fish. They got skunked. A fifty-thousand dollar boat, forty-bucks in gas, armed with hundreds of dollars in rods, tackle, and gear.

Then along comes Maria… Nice job, kiddo!

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It’s happened to all of us. You find your seat on an airplane in Bozeman and strike up a conversation with your seatmate. You belly up to a bar in Miles City and start talking to the guy on the next to stool. You wait to check into a hotel in Missoula and chat with the couple ahead in line. Most of the time you will discover you know someone in common.

And, inevitably we say, “Dang, it’s a small world.”

It’s happened to Charley in places like San Francisco, Miami, Chicago, Toronto, Rio de Janeiro, Cartagena, and Brisbane. We meet another American and after a few minutes we’re sharing stories about somebody back home.

But, how small is the world? Is it really that odd to make a connection? Is it happenstance?

Enter the concept of Six Degrees of Separation. The theory suggests any one of the 8 billion people on Earth can be connected to another person through a chain of no more than six acquaintances.

The notion of six degrees of separation grew out of work conducted by Harvard University psychologist Stanley Milgram in the 1960s. Earlier researchers called it the Six Handshakes Rule.

Recently mathematicians Watts and Strogatz calculated the average degree of separation to be 5.96.

Either way, the concept has morphed from an unban myth to generally accepted science.

The six degrees theory says that two people who know each other are one degree apart, while two people who don't know each other but have a mutual acquaintance are two degrees separated. Milgram went on to suggest that in the United States we can assume three degrees of separation.

Algorithms projecting degrees of separation assume that the average person on Earth has 45 acquaintances.

It’s safe to assume the average American knows far more than 45 people—especially in the age of social networking.

Of course mitigating factors in degrees of separation can be age, employment, social status, income, and ethnicity and race, among others.

Logic would tell us that in Montana only two degrees of separation exist.

So the next time you strike up a conversation with a stranger, anywhere in Montana or elsewhere, remember the Six Degrees rule. Or, test it out.

But, don’t be surprised—accept that it really is a small world after all!

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Handshakes are an important way to communicate, and play a important role in a first impression. Lifelong friendships often begin with only a handshake. Handshakes can signal farewells. Wars have been ended by a handshake. Business deals are commonly sealed with a handshake. Personalities can be judged by a handshake.

Ten Steps to an Effective Handshake

1. Offer your hand with your fingers straight and your thumb high.

2. Don’t grip until the other person’s thumb is locked next to yours.

3. Lead the other into the firmness of the mutual grip. This can be tricky.

4. Two or three small handshakes is enough. You’re not milking a cow.

5. Maintain eye contact throughout the handshake.

6. Don’t shake hands with your left hand in your pocket.

7. If you’re sitting, stand up. Formal handshakes are always done standing.

8. Be a role model while shaking hands with kids. But, don’t over do it.

9. The person initiating the handshake should usually disengage the handshake.

10. Hold your beer in your left hand prior to shaking hands.

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